SWFTR SHIRT TALES

Beginning with the premise that there's a story behind every race t-shirt,  hence, every runner has a   story regarding every race they've run, this feature attempts to share a few of these unique  experiences with the reader.

(The following race caused me to learn a new term, "I.T. Band Syndrome" and I haven't been able to forget it.)

    Back in September     of '86, a small daring group from Hugoton, KS set  out on a mission of     survival, all vowing to complete the mission and  come back alive.      We arrived in Newton under cover of darkness  and immediately set  about   finding our target.  Target located,  we settled intoa  motel for  the night.
    At 0500 hours on Saturday, we readied ourselves for the task ahead.  We reached the target zone in plenty of time.  The planned assault was in five parts, and each of us would complete all five before the morning was over.  At 0700 hours, the mission,   code-named "Bethel's Complete Feat", began.  The conspirators involved  were:  "Mr. Bill" Brennan; Dr. William "Doc" Brown; Mark Davis;  Dale Krueger; and myself, Emery "Eminator" Swagerty.
      The five parts of the mission were, in order:   100 meter dash; 400 meter dash; 1600 meter run; 5K run; and 10K run.   The field included 80 to 10 runners, but several had no intention (delusion)  of doing the complete feat, just focusing on 2 or 3 races.
             The unique scoring system used a computer to   compare    each competitor's time with the world record for the competitor's    age  and gender for the same distance.  Points were awarded accordingly.  A first place award went to the competitor with highest single-event    point  total.  1st and 2nd places were awarded to those with the besttwo-event point     totals.  This pattern ended with the top five five-event totals also earning     awards.  It really took a lot of organization to handlethese results.  In   fact, results print-outs were available the same daythat included everyone's     name, age, race timesand points awarded.  Awardswere not divided into   age  andgender groups because the computercomparison had the handicapping    built into the system.
      When the final stage of the mission arrived, it truly was a survival game for many, including myself.  It was a battle to keep heading towards the turn-around after meeting most of the field on their return trip.  When I was finally on the way  back, I was so way back it would take a "Wayback Machine" to find me.   I'd never been passed by a wheelchair participant before, but there's  a first time for everything.  I might have felt better about itif  it had at least been a racing style wheelchair instead of theaverage  every-day variety.
The hill on the last quarter mile worked to  my advantage, however,and allowed me to pass him, even though at this  point I couldn't sprint (on my toes anyway) without half my foot going  numb.  I had to sprint in an awkward flat-footed style, but I  finally reached the finish line.  The rest of my group had already triumphed over the unforgiving course, although not without some suffering as well.
               I remember "Mr. Bill" detouring through the  bar     ditch and shaking a beverage carton in the hope it might still  contain     a full can, but no such luck.  At least his clowning  around provided     some comedy relief and an enjoyable memory of an  unforgettable race.
               I guess the restof the group still had vivid   memories   of the  event when, the next year, I inquired as to whether   there was   any interest  among them in doing it again.  Their  reactions were   such that you'd think  they were my Runners Anonymous  support group.    Maybe they decided  I hadn't "fully recovered"  yet if I was even considering   repeating the experience.